my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize
