i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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