Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
