Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
