I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
"it" just moved
Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
Who did Billy Mays play for?
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
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