idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
