I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
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