I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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