I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Randomize
