Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
