Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
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