I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
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