And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
Randomize
