Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
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