ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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