Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
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