Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time
Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother.
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.