let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
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