you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
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