he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Randomize
