She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't put those talents on a resume
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
You ate ashes out of my bong
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Randomize