i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize
