I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize