I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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