Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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