i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Randomize
