dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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