I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
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