Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
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