Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize
