$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Randomize