my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
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