His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
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