Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
Randomize
