Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
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