my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
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