You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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