I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
