yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
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