Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize