Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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