My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
I could fuck to npr.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
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