i need an iv and a liver transplant
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
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