i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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