please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
Randomize
