what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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