I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize