i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
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