I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP ππππ
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