Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
