Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Randomize
